Last month, I attended the Ground Breakers retreat from Art of Accomplishment.
I’d been waiting two years for this program—one that so many people I admire in the Coaching (Personal & Executive), Transformational, and Optimization spaces have raved about. (For example, read Tiago Forte’s experience.)
I’ve been a student of Joe Hudson’s work—the founder of AoA—for five years. It was time to go deeper. And boy/girl… I DID.
I’ve spent years tinkering with my own mind: applying the work of Tony Robbins, Joe Dispenza, psychedelics, meditation, etc.
All of them worked—until they didn’t anymore.
When I got to Groundbreakers—a week-long immersive retreat—I wasn’t just emotionally stuck.
I was… emotionally constipated.
I arrived in a strange state.
Someone known for optimization… yet internally tangled in a tight web of resentment, stagnation, and emotional noise I couldn’t put my finger on—much less clear.
I was fighting my own mind. And I was constantly losing.
That week, I finally got in touch with my frustration, anger, fear, shame, sadness, despair, and grief.
All the emotional data buried beneath the surface-level resentment.
But here’s the twist:
I didn’t get there by chanting kumbaya, taking a hallucinogen, or praying to a deity.
We went somatic. Meaning—I embodied every emotion.
I let it emerge and take its natural course, in a safe, non-judgmental space.
Visceral doesn’t even begin to describe it—especially surrounded by 20 other humans and a team of powerfully trained facilitators.
Most people think that controlling or suppressing uncomfortable emotions will prevent them from “going mad” or “losing their sh*t.”
But my theory is this:
Because we lack safe, welcoming, and non-judgmental spaces to fully express emotions beyond language, we’re unknowingly building emotional time bombs.
In the name of being “civilized,” we suppress. We disconnect.
And every time we do, we cast a vote against our aliveness—and build that bomb, bit by bit.
Instead, when we create safe, embodied spaces to feel fully, we allow our neurobiology to complete what I now call emotional cycles—the antidote to emotional constipation.
After a few days of yelling, crying, and hitting that foam cube (yep, very civilized of me), something clicked.
My mind got quieter. Clearer.
And after a few more days of becoming a full-on caveman, I discovered something even deeper: A cleaner, healthier way to relate to my mind.
I had forgotten that I wasn’t my mind.
I had become fused with it—believing every thought, every voice was me.
But the spell broke one morning over breakfast—midair, a spoonful of cottage cheese on its way to my mouth—when I suddenly saw it clearly:
I hadn’t been fighting my mind.
It was my mind that was fighting itself.
The “ugly” emotions? They started to feel less heavy. I could name them. Savor them. Let them run their course—without being swallowed whole.
And by the end of the retreat, I touched a level of joy and peace I had forgotten existed.
There were many, many, many moments, situations, and connections during the retreat that led me to that outcome.
And I will always remember every single person involved in the process.
Here’s what I know now:
When we disconnect from ourselves and each other, we suffer.
But when we reconnect with ourselves—we heal.
And in doing so, we contribute to the optimization of others.
So I’ll leave you with this:
When was the last time you let yourself feel—fully, without analyzing, fixing, or judging?
Because if you’re constantly fighting your mind…
maybe it’s time to be compassionate with it— and with the struggle it created for itself.
PS: If this work resonates, the Connection Course from AoA is a great starting point and they open enrollments a few times per year. And, you can use this code for a discount: jjaf9CF6